We tend to label the objects around us; a rock, a tree, a table, etc. When we label something our attitude about it changes from “curiosity” to “knowingness”. We think we “know” what a rock is so we seldom give them much thought. We can categorize them, measure them, modify them. But do we really understand the atoms that form its structure? The silent energy it holds. If you released the energy in a rock the size of your hand, you’d have an explosion greater than Hiroshima.
These labeled objects are often just passive things outside of ourselves and we don’t give them much thought. For us, they barely exist in our presence and they completely disappear from our thoughts in their absence.
But that’s just our perspective. They go on living out their own impermanent existences at their own levels of awareness. Most aren’t aware of us either, and the ones that are usually try to hide from us.
Stop and Smell the Roses
Step into a garden or a forest and you are literally surrounded by countless millions of living beings; Animals, trees, flowers, insects, bacteria. Each of them, pulsing with their own life energy, just like you are pulsing with your own life energy.
These beings don’t speak the way that we do. But they do communicate, nonetheless. That fragrant smell of freshly cut grass is really a warning to other grass that it is being attacked.
Speech is just a small part of how we communicate with other people. Many couples do not speak at all when they are in bed together but that doesn’t mean they aren’t communicating. If they have a strong connection, they can communicate on a deeper level than verbal speech.
But your partner can’t connect with you on this deeper level unless you are open to it and have some awareness of it. This can be difficult at first.
Connect to a Plant
This exercise can help us to connect with our partner.
Pick a plant you like. Dirk likes to pick a big old tree but you can pick your favorite house plant. The plant needs to be living and in an active state (i.e. not a dormant tree in winter).
Try to mentally connect to it. Think about its life force. Think about what it’s doing right now in the moment. Is it happily soaking up the sunshine? Is it thirsty? Think about its history. If it is an old tree, think about all the storms and winters it has endured over the years. All the people and animals that it’s given shelter to.
Put yourself on the same level as the plant. It is doing the best job it can with the tools it has. You have different abilities but that doesn’t make you superior.
Put your hand up to the plant. Try to visualize its life energy interacting with yours.
Talk to it in your mind. Try to make a mental connection. Introduce yourself. Open yourself up to it completely. Tell it you love it and appreciate it.
Learning to connect non-verbally to other beings in your environment can help you open yourself up to deeper connections with your partner.